Last time we started looking at our values. For some of you this may have been the first time you have given much thought about your values. For others, you may have had a good idea what your core values are and the exercise confirmed your assumptions. Did you know that your habits reflect your values? Also, how we live out our daily lives reflects our true values, particularly in times of stress. or crises or when important decisions have to be made.
People who are not aware of their values are more easily influenced by their circumstances, the latest trends or fads and by what other people think and say. People who live their lives consistent with their values tend to have more inner peace, less stress, more confidence and sense of direction. Divorce is such a stressful time and there are many decisions to be made. If you look at the decisions you have been making do you have peace and confidence and feel like you know the direction you are headed? Or do you feel a bit confused? Easily persuaded or influenced by your attorney or others around you? Are you making decisions based on what other people say?
If you do not have peace and you are feeling confused, this may be a good time to discover your values and what is important to you. Getting in touch with your values will help you to clarify the direction you should go. When you know the direction you need to go, it is easier to move forward. Having clear values will help you to make good decisions. When you understand which values are most important then you can make decisions that are aligned with the highest values on your priority list.
When you live your life aligned with your core values you are more effective in your role as a parent, employee, leader, etc. You are able to have healthier relationships. You will be more fulfilled and satisfied. This is something you can do for yourself, to help you move forward and become the best person, parent, employee or leader that you can be. I encourage you to take the time to become aware of your core values and to live them out in your daily life.
To prompt your awareness I have listed some values below for you to consider. The purpose is to get you thinking. By all means add your own values that may not be listed. To begin, write down 10- 15 values. Next time we will look at your list, so keep it handy.
accomplishment affirmation ambition beauty
being in control caution career collaboration
community compassion competence competition
creativity determination diligence efficiency
elegance encouragement enlightenment excellence
faithfulness family forgiveness forward looking
freedom frugality fulfillment fun
gentleness genuineness good taste growth
hard work honesty humility humor
impacting people independence influence integrity
joy lack of pretense love marriage
making money mentoring obedience orderliness
patience peace performance persistence
personal power physical vitality productivity purity
quality recognition relaxation respect for people
respect for life respect for environment risk taking security
self-esteem self-expression sensitivity servanthood
service sexual fulfillment silence solitude
spiritual growth stability success temperance
tolerance tongue control tranquility trust
truth winning worship
copyright 2008 Shelley Grieser
