I have decided to change my writing style for my blog. For educational type information that I want to share, I will write articles and post links here on my blog. I realize there is so much to share just from the day to day, living out life as a single parent and single person. As I read posts from people on the Internet in Facebook groups and forums, meeting people who are in the process of divorce or have gone through divorce, I get inspired.
One of the most pressing needs I find when people are going through a divorce is finding other people that they can relate to. Your family and friends want to help and support you, but unless they have been through a divorce themselves they can not truly relate. Usually when you are married most of your friends are married, especially if you have young children.
When my husband and I separated, my children were 4 years and 2 years old. I had only lived in Colorado for 2 years. I was a stay at home mom. We lived in a relatively new neighborhood with young families. My friends were the play group moms and preschool moms. I did not know anyone in my area that was divorced. I had a couple of friends back in Kansas City that had been divorced, but that did not help me much in Colorado.
A year after we separated my husband decided to "move on." It was January 5, 2001 and 2 days later while sitting in church, the bulletin had an announcement for a Divorce Recovery group beginning on Jan. 16th. I knew I needed support in this area to get through the road that lay ahead of me.
Last week I was talking to one of my friends from my Divorce Recovery group and she shared with me how scared she was to go to the Divorce Recovery group. She said all she had wanted to do was to isolate herself. She told me how hard it was for her to take that step to go to the group that first night. It was very uncomfortable for her, but she took that step and went.
She is so thankful that she went despite her fears. She recognizes that she recovered more quickly from having attended the Divorce Recovery group. I would have to agree that it helps expedite the healing process. The content taught in the group, the lectures, the book were all valuable. Yet one of the most valuable aspects of the group, was the relationships. It provided the opportunity to meet other people in the same emotional place as you are, broken, hurt, angry, sad, and afraid. The ability to share your story and connect with each others in a way that only those who have walked the path of divorce can truly understand.
Some of the best advice I could ever give someone going through a divorce would be to find a support group in your area or on-line to attend/join. Even if you are afraid, take that risk and step out to find out. It may be one of the best decisions you make and you will never know if you don't do it.
If you need help finding a Divorce Recovery Group read my post on how to find one. Blessings to you on your path to recovery.
copyright 2008 Shelley Grieser All rights reserved
