Did your spouse use to give you compliments? Did he or she tell you that you looked nice or that they appreciated you, or things that you did? Did they ever recognize and acknowledge your efforts? Maybe they did or maybe they didn't? My husband was not one to give many compliments. Maybe you have family around that offers support or encouragement to you. If so, good for you! Most single parents don't have someone around to offer support, encouragement or praise.
As a single parent it is easy to feel unappreciated. Last weekend I took my almost 11 year old daughter shopping for new clothes because she had outgrown all of her cooler weather clothes. My daughter is getting to the age where she doesn't think I know anything. Case in point, on a previous shopping trip before school started, I tried to suggest certain styles for her to consider, like the cute leggings and long tops that are popular. Her response was "no one will be wearing that to school."
Funny a couple of weeks later she was asking me to take her shopping to get some leggings and long tops. Go figure. As many single parents, I only have my children every other weekend. Since fashion is not one of my ex-husband's strengths, I have agreed to take the kids shopping for the clothes at both houses. This means we only have every other weekend (because weeknights are too busy with activities and homework) to try and squeeze in a bit of shopping.
I don't particularly enjoy shopping, but I do care what my children look like. I want them to be clean, reasonably well groomed and put together. My daughter and I spent Saturday evening shopping and were fairly successful, except with shoes. So, on Sunday while running an errand to Target, I cruised through the shoe department looking for some shoes. I found a cute pair of slip on type canvas shoes. I don't know, I think they look like ballet type tennis shoes. I thought these would be perfect. So I buy them and bring them home (along with a couple of pairs of flip flops on clearance, $1.98.)
Let us back up a few hours, my 13 year old son returned home from a weekend camping trip around noonish that day. He had a project due for school so after lunch he began his homework. As a single mom I have looked forward to the day that my son would be old enough to help (or takeover) mowing the lawn. All weekend my thought was that my son would get home from camp and be able to mow the lawn on Sunday. After all it is only every other weekend that I get this help.
Late afternoon I left to go run a few errands, picking up some groceries for the week etc. I arrive home excited to show my daughter the shoes/flip flops I found. Much to my surprise I am met with "I am not wearing those shoes (the tennis shoes)…" Wow! After spending several hours shopping for her and trying to take care of her clothing needs, I was feeling unappreciated.
Then, I found my son still working away on his homework and it became apparent that he was not going to be able to mow the lawn. Our trash pickup is on Monday so I try to have the lawn done by Sunday night to put the clippings in the trash.
So, I changed my clothes and proceeded to go out and mow the lawn before sunset. Trying not to let my mind go to that place, no other women have to mow their lawns in my neighborhood, I work so hard to take care of the house and my kids needs and they don't even appreciate me, sure would be nice to have someone to help do everything, blah blah blah….The nice dinner I had planned was delayed, but tastey all the same.
Every once in awhile I have one of those days where, as a single mom I feel unappreciated by my children and overwhelmed and tired of having to do it "all." How bout you? Do you ever have one of those days? Little things pile up, things don't go as you had planned or hoped they would. Your children do not seem to appreciate "all" that you do for them or realize how much there is "to do." What do you do? How do you handle "one of those days?"
Tomorrow I will share with you how I handled this particular day. I will offer you some tips on what you and I can do to better handle "one of those days" when they come along. Until then, I hope you are having a "good" day!
copyright 2008 Shelley Grieser All Rights reserved
